Column - Challenges, compromises of planning our weddingFrom a guy’s perspective, planning a wedding can be a nice warm-up for what I figure married life will be like.
By: Eric Morken, Alexandria Echo Press
From a guy’s perspective, planning a wedding can be a nice warm-up for what I figure married life will be like.
My fiancée, Mali, has been great with all the planning since we got engaged in March. She’s the organized one. Everything that needs to be done by a certain date is done a month in advance.
She found her dress within the first two weeks of our engagement. Picking a date? We were flipping through her calendar within hours of the proposal.
Consider her the antithesis of me when it comes to planning. I don’t procrastinate until the last minute, but I can’t see the need in finishing everything weeks in advance. This whole process has taken some compromise on both our parts.
It started with picking the date. Mali and her mother are so efficient they could have planned the wedding in a few months if our summer schedules would have allowed that. Eight weddings from May through September didn’t make that possible, so I suggested a January 1 wedding with the easy-to-remember anniversary of 1/1/11.
For a couple months, the thought of getting married on New Year’s Day thrilled Mali. Not long into the planning, though, she was almost done with most of the important stuff. That and the possibility of a blizzard ruining our wedding day had her second-guessing our decision.
I thought she was joking when she asked me what I thought about moving the wedding up. Thirty minutes later she asked again and we were right back at stage one.
Choosing a new date required me to start looking at things with an open mind. Months earlier, I settled on January 1 because it was around Christmas, a time when most of our friends from around the country would be back home with family. That’s at least what I convinced everyone of.
The fact that the entire month of October is a beautiful time to be in the woods bow hunting might have also been on my mind. I couldn’t think like that this time around. What kind of guy can look his fiancée in the eyes and tell her she can’t get married on a certain day because he has plans to go deer hunting that weekend? Not me. Not this time, anyway. Finally, our date was set in stone for October 30.
There have been a few tense moments as we’ve gotten closer to the day. Mali has had to be patient with me when it takes me a week to get something done. I have also accepted the fact that things she has asked me to do have been few and far between. The least I can do is get them done in a timely manner.
It’s all about compromise. Mali has done her part to make sure she sees my side of things, too. She has even agreed to let me spend the morning of our wedding hunting pheasants. I just have to be at the church by 1 p.m. Compromise.
“It’s Our Turn” is a weekly column that rotates among members of the Echo Press editorial staff.